Feeling The Sunlight Slip Away
by MayFairy
Summary: Extended scene from the start of Full Circle. Romana won't accept the Doctor's blasé reaction to her approaching departure, and her confrontation leads to an unexpected kiss and a confession of true feelings when confronted with losing each other. Four/II


**Okay, so I wrote this because let's face it...the beginning of Full Circle is so sad because it's so obvious that she's devastated that she has to leave him, and he's pretending not to care, and she's so hurt that she hides it and pretends to be all tough, and it's just heartbreaking. **

**So...I say that this is what should have happened, and if you want another Full Circle fix-it, check out Ace of Gallifrey's 'Hand in Hand for Eternity'. **

**Pairings: Four/Romana II, and a bit of implied Eight/Romana II at the end.**

**The title is inspired by the song 'She is the Sunlight' by Trading Yesterday, a song that immediately made me think of Romana II, because she's just got that sort of aura. I would recommend listening to it, it's very sad and quite fitting for the feelings of Four to do with Romana leaving him. **

**For those of you who haven't seen Full Circle, basically, the Time Lords send them a message saying that they want Romana back, and so they set a course for Gallifrey. **

**After this they accidentally go into E-Space (a sort of parallel universe place), where Romana decides to stay so that she doesn't have to go back to Gallifrey.**

**And some of this is canon, up until "I'm afraid so." That's when I change things to my own design. :)**

**If you want to watch the beginning scene of the serial just to know more about what's going on, here's a link...**

**h t t p : / www . youtube . com / watch ? v = ek _ LvE5ERf0**

**Enjoy!**

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><p>The Doctor entered Romana's room slowly, unsure of what he was going to find. Romana was lying on her bed, looking incredibly glum. She wasn't staring at anything in particular, just thinking, something he did often.<p>

Only this time, the subject of her thoughts was rather obvious.

He coughed pointedly. "Do you mind if I come in?"

She was quietly for a moment, sighing. "The Time Lords want me back." She said eventually, forlorn. Her voice made it sound as though she was close to tears.

They had both known that this day had been coming, but it had been so easy to pretend it wasn't, to forget…

"Yes, well, you only came to help with the Key to Time," He reasoned, picking up a small book from a pile and flicking through it. Anything to not have to look at her face, not look into her eyes and feel all the reasons he had told himself for taking her back melt away.

The Doctor did his best to keep his demeanour impartial, after all, if she knew how much he was reluctant for her to go also, then he would never be able to get her to go to Gallifrey.

"Doctor, I don't want to spend the rest of my life on Gallifrey!" Romana said abruptly, upset. "After all this!"

"Well…"He said, keeping his attention on the small book in his hands so that he wouldn't have to look at her. "You can't fight Time Lords, Romana."

He could hear her getting off her bed and coming up behind him. "You did," She reminded him slowly, "Once."

"Mm…" He nodded, "And lost." She didn't reply immediately.

"Well, nothing more to discuss, then!" She sounded as though she was trying to hold back anger and confusion.

"I'm afraid so," The Doctor said slowly. He couldn't react to her words, he couldn't let her see how much the thought of giving her back was tearing him apart…

Silence filled the room for a few moments, and just as he was about to turn and go back to the console room, he found Romana speaking again, this time with her voice raised.

"Don't you care?" She asked angrily, and he turned to look at her in wide-eyed surprise.

"Care?" He repeated.

"Here I am, about to walk out of this TARDIS for good, walk out of _your life_ for good, and here you are, acting as though this is nothing!" Romana spat harshly, looking incredibly hurt. She crossed her arms and waited for him to respond.

"Nothing? You think I don't care?" He asked incredulously, realising that pretending to be fine with taking her home was obviously not the way to go. He stared at her.

"Well, with the way you're acting, it seems like you could care more if I stole your jelly babies," She muttered with a hint of snark, casting her eyes to the floor.

"Well, I think I would care quite a lot if you stole my jelly babies," The Doctor began with a smile, trying to get her to smile also, but she merely shot him a glare. "But I'll tell you right now, Romana, that I would rather see every jelly baby in the universe die a horrible, sticky death before I let you walk out of this TARDIS with no intent of coming back."

Her eyes met his, a small twinkle now there. Her lip twitched in reluctant amusement. "You always did have such a way with words, Doctor," She teased, her voice quiet. Despite her joking tone, the relief and gratitude in her eyes was obvious.

"Well, I find this mouth of mine is extremely talented, don't you think so? I can rattle off more words a minute than a dictating Judoon, and that's saying something." He said seriously, nodding. She smiled in an almost melancholy way.

Suddenly the Doctor found himself in a tight hug, with Romana's arms firmly around his middle. He hesitated before gently placing his own around her.

"I can't go back to them, Doctor. I'm not like them anymore, I'm like you, and I want to stay with you." She said, her words slightly muffled by his coat and scarf, but he still heard them perfectly, and found them digging into his hearts.

Why did she have to make this harder than it already was?

"I can't just go back there, I belong here. With you." She said, looking up at him seriously.

"Oh, Romana," He sighed. "How can I let you go?"

"Don't."

His face came down next to hers so that his nose brushed her cheek. The intimacy was painful and wonderful for both of them at the same time.

Her arms wound up around his neck, and he crushed her body to his in a desperate embrace.

"Trying to run from the Time Lords would be a big mistake, Romana." He said quietly.

"You're always making mistakes, Doctor, haven't I always told you so? You're good at them. This could be your greatest mistake of all." It was a strange metaphor, but the meaning was clear. She wanted him to try, to not give up without a fight.

"Even I can't make a mistake like this." He said in a defeated tone.

She pulled away, wiping at her wet eyes. "Don't let them claim something that isn't theirs to claim, Doctor," She said seriously.

"You are a Gallifreyan and they are the High Council of Time Lords, Romana. If they cannot claim you, who can?" He inquired sensibly.

Romana sniffed, tilting her chin up slightly. "I believe that the man I love can." She was clearly terrified as she said the words, but her voice held strong and said them without a tremble.

The Doctor felt his hearts fall out of their synchronised rhythm momentarily. Wordlessly, he took the few necessary steps forward before cupping her head gently and pressing a kiss to her lips.

They had kissed before, of course, in Paris, and while punting in Cambridge. But they had been the only times, and they had treated them as though they meant nothing, almost like a game. After she had nearly lost him on the spaceship when dealing with the Nimon, Romana had kissed him briefly, but had insisted afterwards that it was because she was glad that he was alive. She had acted rather embarrassed about the whole thing. It certainly wasn't any kind of emotional transference.

This time was different.

The way she was kissing him back, it was almost pleading, begging him not to let her go back, holding onto his scarf like a lifeline. He kept it chaste but passionate, and found his goodbye and apology pouring through it.

He could taste her tears too, and when they finally pulled apart only to stare at each other for several minutes, he could see that her eyes were still not dry.

It seemed as though they could have stared at each other for decades without moving, but then the ship lurched and they felt space and time twist through their brains, and they were quick to rush into the console room to check with K-9 what was going on.

Romana never kissed that tall, large-toothed, wild haired Doctor again.

The same could not be said for his Eighth body, of course.

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><p><strong>I hope you liked it! Four's quite hard to write, actually, he's a very complex character. <strong>

**Please let me know what you think...especially about whether they were OOC!**

**Please review! **

**-MayFairy :)**


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